bittersweet goodbyes

My Beloved is on his way to Minnesota (he is actually there now). He begins work at his new job tomorrow. I am so proud of him. It's been 20 months since he lost his job of 10 years. He has landed a good job after many searches and interviews with other companies. 

Many people are sad to see him go. He has been a teacher of junior high school students in a Bible study class once a week. His students made him a strawberry cake and gave him a photo of themselves so, he will not forget them. How could he? They are each unique and amazing young people who have really enjoyed having his as their teacher. He's the type of teacher that uses current events and movies (like Kung Fu Panda) as examples of faith and Bible lessons. 

 He had planned on leaving early Friday morning for the 27 hour drive from our home to MN. As the day progressed, it was closer to the time our four children come home from school. Even though he had said "good-bye" to them that morning, he needed one more "good-bye". 

 Here he is in a tender moment with our Max. 

 Charlotte adores her Daddy and had to give him a  "smooch kiss".

Grant and Benjamin chased after him to say one last "good-bye". 

I wiped the tears from my cheeks and put on my strong Mommy face. He leaves with my heart. He plans on returning for Grant's birthday at the beginning of April. Until then, Carry On!

My Beloved's Birthday

My Beloved jokes about meeting me when I was a teenager. It's true; I was two weeks shy of turning 20. He was already 20. This was back in May of 1986. We were babies practically. But, within a few weeks, I knew I would spend the rest of my life with this man.

When he was 20, he was zero population growth. I wanted to have 5 kids. He was in pre-med classes at the university. I wanted to be a photojournalist.

 He hadn't been around many children in his teen years. I was around children all the time (my nieces and nephews, and children I babysat or cared for through volunteer work at the hospital). I figured I could change his mind over time.

As he got to know my family, his feelings about having children changed. By the time he was 22, two children was enough (two being the perfect number to replace us - still zero population growth).

We dated off and on for 5 years. A lot of those years were painful. The pain was primarily caused by our  poor choices. I dated a few others during those five years but, I knew my heart belonged to this guy named David.

He mustered the courage to ask my Father for my hand in marriage. My Father agreed! 

 A few weeks later he took me on a chaperoned date on 13 February 1991. 

After midnight, on the top of Mount Soledad in San Diego, he was down on a knee asking me to marry him.

He teases me about never saying, "yes". I said, "Of course I'll be your wife!" We were married four months later.

 After some time in England in 1993, he told me, on my birthday, that he wanted to start a family. I was thrilled. I have always had a strong intuition and had a deep sense that having babies would not be an easy thing for us to do. I was right.

 It took us nearly 10 years of loss and suffering and many miscarriages to come to the decision that we didn't want to grow old without children. 

 We decided to adopt. We chose "open-adoption".  

From the time we signed up with our agency to the time our birth mother gave birth to our first son, nine months had passed. The length of a pregnancy. I had the honor of being in the delivery room when Grant was born. My Beloved and his parents were right outside the delivery room doors and heard his first cry. 

God works in mysterious ways.

Two and a half years later, I gave birth to our next three children. Triplets. Maxwell, Charlotte, and Benjamin.

 My Beloved is the best Dad. I could not have chosen a better Daddy for our four gifts. I think the best gift he is giving them is his love for God and their mom (me!).

 He was born on St. Patrick's Day 1966. His Mom says, "He was born in time for the evening news."

He is Scots-Irish (like me) and German. He loves my corned beef and cabbage, potato leek soup, pastries, apple or berry pies. 

He is an intellectual and would rather talk about string theory than sports. 

He is well read, loves dark coffee and classical music. 

He can play most wind instruments and has marched with a tuba in the most popular of America's parades (Macy's and The Rose Parade) more than once.

Anytime we watch Jeopardy, he is answering most of the questions right.

He has grieved not being a physician but, it's just as well. He is color blind and can't see bruising or redness on skin very well. 

Instead, he has a degree in chemistry.

 During these past 19 months of unemployment, he went back to school and is finishing up his Master's degree in plastics. He's a smart one.

 On this day of his birth 45 years ago. I wish him another blessed and happy birthday. 

May he grow old, by my side, and see our children's children having babies. 

Happy Birthday David Leon Gibson.

je' taime

winter break in minnesota (road trip)

We decided to load up the van with the kids and Pup and head to Minnesota last week. It was the children's winter break from school. 

We had planned to leave by early evening on Wednesday but, my Beloved had an assignment due for school and I was still cleaning and packing. We put the kids to bed after 8 and by 10 our Ben was vomiting. 

Bless his heart. He fell asleep on a pile of clean blankets on the floor while I was changing his bed.

I began another load of laundry. By 3 in the morning we were ready to go.

We weren't sure if we should. Benjamin is emotionally intelligent. He is articulate and reasonable for a 6 year old. He was ready to go. No fever, no sickness so, our little troupers found their seats and buckled in for the 26 hour drive.

Pup joined us and usually sat between the driver and passenger seats on the center console. Our Honda Odyssey has made the trek to and from California, to Wyoming and back, and up and down the Maine to Massachusetts coast. Now it's made the trek to Minnesota and back. We pray before every journey.

I began the drive and drove and drove while the others slept. I drove through sleet and freezing rain; through hail and snow. Driving the toll roads gets expensive but, they are clear and salted and sanded and safe.By morning it was time for me to have a break. We entered Indiana  covered in ice. The morning sun sent silvery spikes through each blade of ice. It was magical looking. Every tree encased in ice. Miles and miles of trees encased in ice. Pennsylvania covered in ice. Ohio covered in ice. Indiana covered in ice. Illinois covered in ice. Wisconsin covered in ice. It was surreal.

We made it into Minnesota by 5 in the morning. 

We crashed into beds and had naps.

We promised our children a day at the Mall of America.

We dropped Pup off at the best doggie day care. Peanut's Place. They were ready for him.

The Mall of America is in Bloomington, MN. It is ginormous. 7 acres BIG. There is a theme park in the middle of it and a Lego store smack dab next to the amusement park. It is a young boy's dream of a place.

The wall of Legos is impressive. Of course, Lego is smart in it's marketing. The store is like a museum with little cubbies filled with characters and buildings and themes. 

Walls are packed with Lego boxes. Lego statues are on the ceiling and in the store. The whole store structure looks like one big Lego.

We had to pull the boys forward and out of the store. Thankfully, the amusement park is eye candy too.

We purchased the all-day passes for all 6 of us. That seemed to be the most cost-effective.

We spent the day riding the rides. Over and over again. I highly recommend going to this amusement park on a Thursday when their schools are in session. We had the place to ourselves. There were no lines to wait in, no pushy people or restroom stalls to wait for. It was our own private playground. Fun!

We hadn't had fun like that in a long while. With the prospect of income in the very near future, there was a burden missing from our shoulders. It was a lot of fun watching my Beloved with his sons. Grant and Max are the roller coaster riders. They went on the log ride over and over again. Charlotte and Ben are the more gentle riders. They loved the Backyardagain swings.

We took a lunch break at Johnny Rockets. The vanilla malts and french fries are the best!

It was fun dropping nickels in the counter top jukebox and selecting songs. The Lollipop song, In the Jungle, and Joy to the World (Jeremiah was a bullfrog) are the favorites.

By late afternoon, we were all tired and ready to fetch the Pup and rest in our hotel.

Pup was thrilled to see us and his newly trimmed nails looked great.

We slept well. Friday we explored Minnesota. We checked out my Beloved's new place of employment, looked at neighborhoods and schools and lakes and towns.

There are still a lot of unanswered questions. When will my Beloved begin work? How long until we need to move? Should we try to keep the kids in school here? Will we break even on the sell of our home or lose money? Where should we live there? What can we afford?

One day at a time. Sometimes, one step at a time.

Thankfully, we have the love and support of many.

We left for home on Saturday. It was good to be home. Home is here.

A Journey of Faith starts with a single "yes".

Eighteen months (a year an a half) ago my Beloved was laid off from his job. The company he worked for was purchased by another. Over a years time, this new company let everyone go. My Beloved worked for this company for 9 years. He was a dedicated employee, giving his company more time than many other employees. He has always been a loyal employee with every company he's worked for.                           

This is a new experience for us. We didn't expect it to be a long journey. My Beloved is smart and talented and educated.
After about a month of processing the loss and coming to terms with it, he began the task of searching for another job. 

He put together a map - a guide to find the next job.

He takes the classes offered by his now past company. He tweaks his resume', he searches Monster.com and   joins Linkedin (a professional networking site). He begins to cold call and contacts co-workers from past jobs. He sends out a multitude of resumes and attends job fairs.

Nothing, for a long time.

We are grateful for a severance package that lasts three, yes 3 months. 

We then apply for unemployment.

We live in a nice home. We pay a hearty mortgage to live in a nice home, in a nice neighborhood.

Where were we going? What were we going to do? 

How were we going to stay in our home and provide for our family on unemployment? Our triplets were not yet in school. Should I go back to work? Not yet. My Beloved believed he would land a good job soon.

There were obstacles in the way. My Beloved had phone interviews, in person interviews and had recruiters call. People were interested in him.  Still, no job offer.

We prayed. Our family and friends prayed for us.

Our fellowship supported us. People brought us food, gift cards, cash.

An anonymous donor sent us a large money gift. 

We felt we could stay a little longer in our home. Maybe three more months.

Our family supported us. 

We continued to live in our home and had funds to pay our mortgage and utilities. We were able to put gasoline in our car. We have friends who allowed us to spend a summer week in a cottage in Cape Cod. My
Beloveds parents paid for our trip to Wyoming to spend a summer week in Grand Teton National Park with them and my Beloveds older brother and his wife.  My mother was faithful in sending money to us.

Our children have not suffered. In fact, they loved having their Daddy home in the mornings to make breakfast for them and send them off to school. He was also home when they got off the school bus in the afternoon. He has gotten to know them so well.

We were blessed in supernatural ways. How could we still be in our home after a year and a half?

How could this be? We have been thrifty with our money and had a little amount of money in savings but, never enough to continue to live in our home. 

I babysat, helped others organize and made beaded light catchers to bring in some money but, never enough to live on.

It is not because of anything we have done.

It is because we live our lives with promises from God.

"I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won't have enough room to take it in." Malachi 3:10

"Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you." 1 Peter 5:7

"I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11

We love living here. We love the friends we have here. 

We like this place and our roots go deep.

But, God has a different journey for us.

"You can make many plans, but the Lord's purpose will prevail." Proverbs 19:21

My Beloved flew to Minnesota a few weeks ago. 

The company interviewing him loved him and this past Monday, they offered him a job. A very good job.

One of my friends (Joy Fenton) told me that if this job had been available 3 months into unemployment, my Beloved probably would have turned it down. She says that God knew he needed 18 months to accept it. She is one smart lady. I think she is right.

"Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow." James 1: 2 and 3

A new journey awaits us.